Hoseok: 23 July Year 10

I heard laughter that sounded like a hallucination when I counted to four. I saw a flash of me when I was younger holding someone’s hand in the next moment. I quickly turned to see who it was, but there were only classmates looking at me. “Hoseok,” the teacher called my name. It was then that I realized where I was. It was math class. I was in the middle of counting the fruits drawn in the textbook. Five, six. I continued counting again, but my voice shook and my hands got sweaty as the numbers got larger. The memory from that day lingered in my mind. 

 

I can’t remember my mom's face from that day. I could only recall her giving me a chocolate bar while I was enjoying the amusement park. “Hoseok, count to ten and open your eyes.” I counted all the numbers, but my mom was not there when I opened my eyes. I waited and waited, but she never came back. I had counted up to nine at last. I only had one more to count, but my voice wouldn’t come out. My ears were ringing, and my surroundings became cloudy. The teacher gestured to keep going. My friends were staring at me. I couldn’t remember my mom’s face. It felt like my mom would never find me if I counted one more. 

 

I fell to the ground just like that.

 

@shootinghearts_